“How many siblings do you have?” is a common icebreaker, but my answer is uncommon.
I have a twin brother.
Most people are surprised when they hear this, or at least they perk their eyebrows up and say, “Oh, that’s cool.”
Twins are uncommon, after all, with only 3% of births resulting in multiple children. With that statistic in mind, it’s no wonder that many people find twins to be an interesting, if not strange, concept.
I expect them to ask a couple of questions.
“Are you two close?” is common. “Are you two identical?” is rare. Without fail, though, I always hear the same question: “What’s that like?”
The question is broad, and has no correct answer. Every twin’s experience is different, and when you’ve lived your whole life alongside one person, imagining anything else is difficult.
However, I do have a couple of answers to the question, “What’s it like to be a twin?”
1.. My brother and I are friends. We have similar senses of humor, as friends so often do. We know the same people, mostly through school. Sharing a grade at school offers us that opportunity, and it not only affects the people we’re around but also the activities we are involved in. For example, because we are both 15, Dan and I are taking driving lessons together. Our shared experience creates a friendship that other siblings may not have.
That being said, we are certainly not best friends. Secrets still separate us, and fighting is commonplace. Being a twin does not guarantee a perfect sibling relationship.
2.. We are different people. Many forms of media have depicted twins as virtual clones, sharing the same personality, interests, and lives. It couldn’t be further from the truth. My brother and I have very different tastes, and it’s often hard for us to agree. We eat different food, watch different movies, and play different sports.
3.. In a similar vein of thought, “twin telepathy” is not a real phenomenon. I can remember the first time someone asked me about this; it was math class, and a boy asked me to use my “twin telepathy” to call Dan over. All I could think to do was laugh at him. The idea that because two people are of the same age and parentage, we would think identically seemed silly to me.
Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, is the indescribable nature of being a twin. It’s like a limb, familiar and constant. People don’t actively think about having arms or legs; they simply are. I couldn’t imagine life without my brother, even if he isn’t always at the forefront of my mind.
That is what being a twin is like.
